For those that are new around here…I write under a pen name. A couple of years ago I came up with a character (Super Cringe) for my pen name because sometimes your alter ego needs an alter ego. You still with me? Super Cringe has a real dog who also has a fake name, Blanche. I know it’s all very complicated…it has to be to keep the KGB off my back. There’s no way they could untangle this mess….anyway, here’s a fake conversation with my real dog who may or may not have a birthday today.
Super Cringe: Happy Birthday Blanche!
Blanche: It’s my birthday? That’s wonderful, do I get treats?
Super Cringe: Way to get right to it Blanche. Is it because your older now…you can’t remember the gift we gave you on Monday?
Blanche: What gift?
Super Cringe: The chicken with the squeaker…you seemed pretty excited about it when we gave it to you. Remember we gave it to you a couple of days early because the boy was going on vacation with his friend’s family….
Blanche: Ahhh yes, the chicken, where is that thing?
Super Cringe: Seriously, you lost it already?
Blanche: Oh, wait a minute, I hid it in the laundry room…that’s a relief. When does the boy get home?
Super Cringe: Sunday
Blanche: I don’t like it when a member of the pack leaves, it makes me anxious.
Super Cringe: Is that why you smell funky?
Blanche: Bish please, it’s been 100 degrees and I’m wearing fur, you’d smell funky too.
Super Cringe: Fair point. Happy Birthday Blanche!